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Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Got A Little Crazy With Athanasios...

Okay all my fellow Wingnuts...Here's the skinny, the 411, the...Okay, you get the idea.

I had agreed to do a blog hop for a friend of mine, you've seen him on my blog before and his name is wicked difficult to pronounce and spell. His name is Athanasios Galanis AND if you have a little trouble with that...Just do what I do, call him Ath when he's not around to bristle and get upset. Considering that Athanasios has a certain melodic quality to it, I still don't know if I actually pronounce it right.

But I digress. You see, I had agreed to do this blog hop thingy for him and then my kids' winter break interfered with everything (two weeks with no school....ARGHHHHHH!) and before I knew it, the blog hop was way overdue and I felt about one inch high. That's not to say that I don't stand at an imposing and giantish two and a half inches or anything, but you get my point.

So this is what I came up with. Since I was lax enough to drop the ball so thoroughly with the blog hop, I decided to put the spotlight on Athanasios for a little bit of fun and as it turns out, it's a blog post without too much work on my part...YAY!!!

Before I get to the really fun part, I want to first thank Athanasios for being such a good sport because I managed to break his nose, have him conversing with a purcupine, put the Force in the bathroom with him and just generally screwed up his whole world with my antics. He handled it well...Read for yourself.

And now my wonderful Wingnuts, without further adieu and all that happy...Athanasios Galanis!

RJ Palmer: You’re sitting on the bus on your way to work in the morning and having a lively conversation with the porcupine sitting next to you. Then you get bored and open your new book to page 193 to begin reading. What’s the book about and why did you start reading at page 193?

Athanasios: It’s not my book. I start reading at pg 193 because I found this book on the bus and that’s the first page. The porcupine starts looking at me like I’m a moron, or deviant because nobody else had picked up the book because the cover is a mass of disgusting, hand-drawn depictions of torture, death and destruction.

RJ Palmer: What were you talking about with the porcupine?

Athanasios: He was telling me not to pick up the book.

RJ Palmer: Imagine that you’re walking along the beach admiring the sunset in the east. Tell me what’s wrong with that sentence and why.

Athanasios: The sun sets in the west and rises in the east, though in this case it’s ok because there’s a second son that’s rising in the west, so as far as doing things opposite of what we’re used to this one is doubling the impossibilities.

RJ Palmer: Put these four words together in an intelligent and coherent sentence: banter, lavender, partridge and butter.

Athanasios: I bantered with my wife about our respective days and covered four partridges with butter and lavender before putting them into the oven for our dinner.

RJ Palmer: Where has the time gone?

Athanasios: The time is always gone, it goes where it wills and will never answer that question.

RJ Palmer: Here is a simple set of words. Come up with a sentence to associate each word with the next. Associate number five with number one and explain what the sentence means to you…

Athanasios:
1. Blarney

• The blarney flowed the thickest and was the most difficult to believe every December.

2. December

• This December we’d run out of toothpaste because Colgate was a firm believer that the world would’ve ended on the 21st.

3. Toothpaste

• My toothpaste seems to last forever, to be limitless because I never use it: I use my wife’s just to mess with her head.

4. Limitless

• Limitless cannot be used with our stratosphere because it ends just before it becomes space.

5. Stratosphere

• Two stones fell out of the stratosphere in the dim past, the Stone of Destiny, which is now directly beneath the English Throne and the Blarney Stone, which is kissed by every tourist who visits Cork, Ireland.

• The last sentence gives me an interesting blend of history and irreverence by juxtaposing the Blarney Stone with The Stone of Destiny.


RJ Palmer: Okay, now we’ll play a word association game. I’ll give you five words and you give me the first sentence that pops into your head…

Athanasios:
1. Bring

• Bring the Kraken!

2. Artichoke

• Artichoke hearts were broken when Paul McCartney married Linda.

3. Buffalo

• Buffalo nickels were thicker than most others and some weren’t even round they were facetted.

4. Nostril

• I can fit my thumb into my nostril.

5. Gargoyle

• Every gargoyle story I’ve read or have seen in a movie was compelling if not interesting.

RJ Palmer: What is your favorite color and why are you thinking of the color blue right now?

Athanasios: My favorite color is black, or red if you don’t consider black a color, and I only thought of blue because you brought it up.

RJ Palmer: Why didn’t the Grinch steal Valentine’s Day? Did he eat the chocolate?

Athanasios: The Grinch didn’t steal Valentine’s Day because he had a teeny-tiny heart, he didn’t’ have the equipment. He might steal it in the sequel, now that his heart has grown. No he didn’t steal the chocolate, it’s too dangerous to keep around his little dog.

RJ Palmer: If the Force is always with you, does it let you go to the bathroom all by yourself?

Athanasios: The Force doesn’t let me go to the bathroom all by myself because the Force wipes me clean whenever I go to the bathroom.

RJ Palmer: Do you deny that you were the one who cut the cheese and what kind of cheese was it?

Athanasios: I never deny cutting the cheese because I can’t stop laughing whenever the cheese is cut. It was a moldy, dry feta, what else would it be?

RJ Palmer: Are you still thinking of the color blue?

Athanasios: I was never thinking of the color blue, you keep bringing it into the conversation and should seek further psychiatric help. I say further because I’m sure you’re already in therapy because you can’t stop thinking or talking about the friggin’ color blue!

RJ Palmer: Why were you talking with a porcupine on your way to work?

Athanasios: He talked to me.

RJ Palmer: Explain how these two phrases go together… “The Three Billy Goats Gruff” and “Wendell the Wonder Pig”…And did you realize that this question is numbered 12?

Athanasios: Those two phrases don’t go together, they just sound like the titles of two different children’s books. I don’t care that this question is numbered 12 and is therefore wrong and should be numbered 14 thereby restoring the proper sequence to, what until now, was following some form of logic: NOT!

(Wendell the Wonder Pig is NOT a children's story...Get your fables straight!!)

RJ Palmer: You were walking along reading the morning paper and ran into a wall. Explain yourself and what was the morning headline in the newspaper? Did you spill your coffee?

Athanasios: Ouch, my nose is now bleeding onto the newspaper and therefore I can’t read the headline, because I’ve also broken my glasses from running into the friggin’ wall!! I’m too busy cursing up a blue storm to explain myself, you meddling wench! If I had been paying attention to where I was going instead of following your scenario I wouldn’t have hit this wall! Ouch, Goddamn it hurts! My nose is broken!

On a further note right now from Yours Truly...I didn't manage to run him into the wall hard enough to break his nose. He came up with that all on his own and blamed me. :)

But there you have it, Wingnuts! From the blog of the Head Wingnut in Charge...We stepped out of the normal, got a little left of center and had some fun!

Then, Athanasios told me a little bit about himself. It was probably because I politely demanded a short bio, but here it is nonetheless.

About Athanasios:

Athanasios spends his time working at his job in dvd production and online promoting his indie books. He uses his skills at the regular job to make pretty and striking covers for other indie authors. He hopes to one day do the indie book writing and indie cover making full time from home.

Contrary to whatever his name might evoke, he’s Canadian and watches television, though no sports, lots of movies, and a lot of documentaries.

Is it interesting to anyone else or just to me (RJ Palmer) that he narrated a short bio in the third person? Hmmmm...And he says I'm a therapy case??!

Sooooo...If you like his acid wit and you want to know more about Athanasios Galanis, go and AHEM...BUY his books! "I Am Eternal" can be found here on Amazon and just for fun, we'll let him post a description...

I AM ETERNAL

Simeon Magus has been alive... undead nearly two millennia.

He has watched the undead go from myth to adored celebrity and he exists, hiding from a determined and lethal group of hunters who do not listen to reason and won't stop until he's destroyed.

Simeon witnessed and lived history and he doesn't know if he wants any more of it. He wants to connect with someone again, to feel close to another, but when he meets somebody on a train who knows too much about him, Simeon cannot trust that he isn't another of the Slayers. Is his new friend sent to eliminate him or the hoped for salvation from the tedium of eternity.


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